Personality Clash

I like to think of myself as non-judgmental and open to new people. That’s how I like to imagine myself. I’m a people person. People are my thing. “After all” I think to myself, “I was the fat, spectacled kid of arts people” … as though this somehow implies a birthright to compassionate acceptance and understanding. Every now and then, however, I meet a person who so instantly sets my heckles up that I have to work unbelievably hard to be civil to them, for no apparent reason. When this happens, I find myself affronted by not only the person in question, but also by the fact that I am capable of feeling so instinctively, and yes, judgmentally, revolted. “How can I hate a person I don’t even know?”

My People

She was an entrant in the 1965 Miss Australia Quest. She was Miss Central Northern Suburbs. She was clearly the most beautiful woman in the damn pageant, but no one liked dagoes back then. Italian was NOT in. Despite Sofia Loren. Despite the 19-year-old Italian-Barbarella who would one day be my mother. My mother’s beauty was always something I was proud of as a kid. Proud, in the depressingly defeated way, that only the overweight, spectacled child of a former Miss Central Northern Suburbs can be. I spent hours looking at her technicolour 1960s model-shots wondering how I had sprung from the same genetic well as her. Wondering what, exactly, my hippy-tastic mother had taken in 1970s that produced my “uniqueness”.


… “Intervallo” … It’s Italian for intermission. It’s also what is having for the month of September. Back in October. Big Smiles and lots of Mozzarella!

The Mission

There was a time when I considered 12-hole Doc Martins, a hippy skirt, a Pearl Jam t-shirt, and an expression of complete disinterest to be the only things one should ever wear anywhere. The must-have accessory of that phase was of course, a deftly rolled doobie. My friends and I were that sort of age, […]

The Score

This month I took on ten pin bowling. Invigorated by my recent undertaking to learn how to ride a bicycle, I’d decided to try my hand at other things that had previously been placed in the “things I’m no good at” basket. So bowling it was! I’ll be clear from the outset here, I’m no […]

What Does It Mean?

Every now and then life will lean over and slide an ace across the proverbial table just to prove that, although I’m enjoying playing and we’re letting me feel good about it, I am clearly not in possession of a full deck. In fact, as life nudges me in the ribs to make sure I’ve […]

Perfect Date

I often take myself out on “dates”. Alone. I like to go and sit in a restaurant, at a romantic little table, and watch people. I like sitting by myself. Other people often seem uncomfortable to see me sitting alone, but I quite like it. It is true that on occasion it’s a little awkward being solo, but awkwardness is another skill I excel at, so I even enjoy that. Wait-staff look concerned on my behalf as I request a table for one. They’ll ask repeatedly if I need anything, as though, perhaps, I’ll give in and order a companion from the menu. Nevertheless, despite the discomfort it seems to cause some, I really enjoy going out alone. Sometimes I’ll write while I’m there, but more often I just sit at my table and watch people. Because they’re perfectly fascinating.

Rebranding Skills

I’ve realised that it’s not that I’m a loser who’s no good at things. It’s not that at all. The problem is, I’ve been searching for my hidden skills all this time in the murky and predictable waters of Commonly Accepted Talents. WRONG! Nope, my delicately honed aptitudes belong in a category that would be […]

The Monster

There is a real, live monster that is so frightening it keeps me awake at night with the covers pulled over my head, as I tremble and murmur, “it can’t be real”. But it is. It is real. So scary is this beast, and so gargantuan is its appetite, that it could sandwich Chuck Norris […]

Lighten Up

January of 2011 proved to be a rather heavy month. I wouldn’t say it was morose, but it wasn’t whistling show tunes either. Given that fact, I decided to lighten up a little for February. Once I’d decided this however, I realised that getting from heavy to light was something of a challenge in itself. […]